3.22 Our Wedding


Original Air Date(1): May 11, 1992 • Production Number: 77524
Written by(1): Diane Frolov and Andrew SchneiderDirected by(1): Nick Marck

Chris (marrying Adam and Eve): Marriage. It's a hard term to define. Especially for me--I've ducked it like root canal. Still there's no denying the fact that marriage ranks right up there with birth and death as one of the three biggies in the human safari. It's the only one though that we'll celebrate with a conscious awareness. Very few of you remember your arrival and even fewer of you will attend your own funeral. You pick a society, any society, Zuni, Nudembo, Pennsylvania Dutch. What's the one thing they all have in common? Marriage. It's like a cultural hand-rail. It links folks to the past and guides them to the future. That's not all though. Marriage is the union of disparate elements. Male and female. Yin and yang. Proton and electron. What are we talking about here? Nothing less than the very tension that binds the universe. You see, when we look at marriage, people, we're are looking at creation itself. "I am the sky," says the Hindu bridegroom to the bride. "You are the earth. We are sky and earth united.... You are my husband. You are my wife. My feet shall run because of you. My feet shall dance because of you. My heart shall beat because of you. My eyes see because of you. My mind think because of you and I shall love because of you. Now are you guys cool with that? (6)

Log line(1): Adam and Eve decide to wed for the baby's sake; Maggie avoids Joel like the plague, still believing that they slept together in Juneau; Officer Semanski serves Maurice with an official complaint.

Synopsis(1): Although they have been living together for the last twelve years, Adam and Eve (Valerie Mahaffey) are not officially married. Now that Eve is six months pregnant, they decide they must legally wed for the sake of their child. The town becomes excited over the imminent celebration. Bachelor and bachelorette parties are thrown, the church is decorated, and the wedding attire gathered. All moves along smoothly until Eve begins walking down the aisle. Surprising everyone, she declares she cannot marry Adam because she is heiress to a large fortune. Chris' brother Bernard happens to be in town with a standard prenuptial agreement. After it is signed, the wedding proceeds as planned. Throughout the week prior to the ceremony, Maggie avoids Joel like the plague. Still believing they slept together in Juneau, Maggie is embarrassed at the thought of it. When Joel finally tells her the truth, that she fell asleep before anything happened, she is disappointed that he did not want her badly enough to wake her up. To make herself feel better, Maggie stops by Joel's cabin after the bachelorette party and announces she wants to have sex with him. Joel naturally complies, but as soon as things start to get hot, and Maggie is sure that he wants her, she leaves satisfied. Officer Barbara Semanski delivers Maurice a formal complaint from the neighbor of a large piece of land he owns. The neighbor charges that when Maurice had his land excavated the explosion caused flying debris to hit and wound his grazing animals. The legal matter is quickly forgotten, but the chemistry between Semanski and Maurice remains apparent.

Guest Stars(7):
Bernard - Richard Cummings Jr.

Barbara Semanski - Diane Delano

Background(2): According to Eve, Adam's never held a job for more than two weeks.

Facts to Wax(2): BERNARD, on his way to Novosibirak (Russia) where they're opening a stock exchange and need a CPA, shows up in a shiny new Jeep Cheroeae. Joel subscribes to Wine Spectator. Eve - reformed Christian Scientist, Adam - Quaker. They've been living together twelve years. Eve's net worth - $22 mlllion; her father mines tungsten ore. A thousand cranes bring good luck. Maurice owns a sixty-five acre tract, parcel number 436 of the Borough of Arrowhead. Adam gives Holling's neck and matrimonial conscience an adjustment. Bernard's nevor been married. We see Maggie's living room which looks a lot like her old one.

Music: (3)
• Solar Sex Panel - Little Village

• She Took It Like a Man - Confederate Railroad
[Maggie is uncomfortable seeing Joel in the Brick.](8)

• Jelly's Blues
[Semaski talks to Maurice in KBHR.](8)

• River of Tears - Bonnie Raitt
[Shelly puts umbrellas on cupcakes.](8)

• Poor Butterfly - Benny Goodman
[Bachelor party.](8)

• The Four Seasons: Spring (Vivaldi)
[Bridal shower.](8)

• There'll Be Some Changes Made - Benny Goodman
[Bachelor party continues ...](8)

• The Four Seasons: Winter (Vivaldi)
[Shelly hands out TP for toliet paper brides.](8)

• I Surrender, Dear - Benny Goodman
[Joel and Maurice smoke cigars.](8)

• The Four Seasons: Autumn (Vivaldi)
[Ruth-Anne wraps Maggie a bridal gown out of TP.](8)

Shelly's Earrings:
Leaves or bunches of grapes [asks Eve at the Brick if she can be bridesmaid]
white bunnies [bridal shower]
Pearl drops [wedding]

Literature:
Owl and the Pussy Cat- Edward Lear (6)
Eskimo Love Song [in the wedding vows] (6)

Additional Notes :
Neighbor of Maurice - Ivory Springer
1001 Cranes for good luck at the wedding - how to fold a paper crane

During the Moose Days 2002 Sunday Evening Phone Interviews, we talked with Richard Cummings Jr. (Bernard) who remembered the filming of this episode fondly. Apparently during the scene where Bernard tries to negotiate Eve and Adams "prenuptial agreement," he and Rob Morrow couldn't stop giggling which of course got everyone else giggling.


Created 12/27/01 • Updated 8/20/02

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