I woke up this morning
Without any warning
A song was there in my bod
I started to sing about everything
Bacon, toast and fried cod.
Now that I found it
I just gotta sound it
Gotta Sing... Gotta Sing... Gotta Sing... Gotta Sing

Oh Yeah

I always dreamed that I'd find my true stud
He wouldn't be ditzy, a creep or a crud
I'd be steady, hot, juicy with a butt that won't quit.
He could do what he wanted and plenty of it.

I've been headed this way all of my life
To be the stud of all stud's stand-up wife.

Wo oh woo WOW

A chick in the train in Saskatoon
I partied with Tammy and I prayed to the moon
To win Northwest Passage and never go back
For my bod and my talent to be picked from the pack.

I've been headed this way all of my life
To be the stud of all stud's stand-up wife
To be the stud of all stud's knocked-up wife.

I prayed for loving on the highway of life
That's how I got to be me
A ring, a husband, a bun in the oven
What's more a chick ought to be.

I saw the big H
It was love at first sight.
So I checked out his buns
And man were they tight.
I walked up and told him, "I'm Shelly Marie.
I've found you at last - my true destiny."

I've been headed this way all of my life
To be the stud of all stud's stand-up wife.
To be the stud of all stud's knocked-up wife.

Transcribed by Tony Burke <tonyb@u.washington.edu> - originally posted on the Moose's Guide to Northern Exposure

Shelly (singing, of course):
So you were nice and normal to Dr. F.
And he acted like a jerk,
And you think if you're nice that he should be nice,
But Maggie, i don't it'll work.

Maggie:
No? Why not?

Shelly:
Like the lady with the snake
He's just like he is,
And that's how it's gonna be.

Maggie:
Huh..

(Start music)

On her way to work one mornin down the path alongside the lake,
A timson-hearted woman saw a poor half-frozen snake.
His pretty-colored skin had been all frosted with the dew,
"Poor thing," she cried, "I'll take you in and i'll take care of you."

Chorus:
"Take me in, tender woman,
Take me in for heaven's sake
Take me in tender woman,"
Said the snake.

Maggie:
What happened after that?

She wrapped him up all cozy in her comforter of silk,
And laid him by her fireside with honey and some milk.
She hurried home from work that night and as soon as she arrived,
She found that pretty snake she'd taken in had been revived.

Chorus

She clutched him to her bosom, "You're so beautiful," she cried,
"But if i hadn't brought you in, by now you might have died."
She stroked his pretty skin again and kissed and held him tight.
Instead of saying thanks, the snake gave her a vicious bite.

"Take me in tender woman," sighed the snake.

"I saved you," cried the woman, "and you bit me, but why?
You know your bite is poisonous and now i'm gonna die."
"Oh shut up you silly woman," said the reptile with a grin,
"You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in."

Chorus

Transcribed by jude shabry - originally posted on the Moose's Guide to Northern Exposure

Your Mama Can Only Sing:

Chorus:
Oh, my little bunny face
My teeny beeny cuddly thing
I got a big bummer news
Your mama can't talk
Your mama can only sing

No fakin, No foolin
She flaps her lips and out comes croonin

Baby learns to use a spoon
Mama only sings a tune
Baby counts from 1 to 3
Mama makes a melody
If baby falls and bangs her knee
Sorry, here's a rhapsody

Can you love a mom who can't gab or chatter?
No yak or yammer, chew the fat
No jaw & jabber

Can you love a mom who doowops, scats
She warbles, yodels, spits the scales
She bops and raps

Chorus

Holling:
Shelly, honey, dry your eyes
Worry not, we'll harmonize
In my opinion talk comes cheap
Who needs to make a speech
Truth is, my lovely bride
Sing or talk, i'm by your side

Both:
Oh, my little bunny face
My teeny beeny cuddly thing
Don't you feel lonely, don't you feel blue
Cuz i'll be singin with you
No fakin no foolin
I'll be singin with you

Transcribed by jude shabry - originally posted on the Moose's Guide to Northern Exposure